Iowa City, Iowa — The holidays are a time for families to come together, but friction can sometimes develop that will ruin the festive atmosphere if the wrong conversational subjects are broached.
University of Iowa professor and psychologist Michele Williams says the old adage about not discussing politics and religion holds true, but there are other topics to avoid, too. She suggests using a technique called LARA, which stands for Listen, Affirm, Respond and Ask questions.
You may want to skip chatting with your aunt or uncle about things like inflation, gasoline prices or even vaccines, as they can be hot-button issues. Williams says we tend to talk too much and listen too little, so she suggests striving to have a dialogue, not a debate.
Subjects that are not usually prone to prompt conflict include food, sports, art, or even just the kids. Williams says to try and keep positive feelings front and center during holiday gatherings.
Williams is a UI professor of management and entrepreneurship in the Tippie College of Business and she’s a psychologist who specializes in management communications and relationships.
